Please convince me not to stangle this guy

[awh]

Al, I know what your talking about bud. We have 8 rentals and tis so much fun dealing with complete morons on a daily basis.

A few months ago we had a lady that was behind a little on rent, had her boyfriend and two other guys living with her and one of them made the mistake of mouthing off to Lil-man. Now me being the nice quite guy I am, I merely walk over from my house , drinking a beer, knock on the front door and wait. I know they are in there but they don't want to talk to me....soooo.....I ask them in a "very" nice way to open the door or I'll open it for them. Well here come the 3 little pricks thinking they are going to impress the slut. So as they are yelling at me about the laws and threatening to kick me arse, I'm still drinking that beer..and smiling. I finish the beer, hand the can to the slut and tell her to throw it away and step up on the porch with the 3 want-to-be gangsters. Still smiling I ask them to leave or I will "help" them to leave. Now my brother shows up. He sits in his truck , drinking his beer, laughing his arse off at me. I finally get feed up with all the threats and start walking in the rental. They try to stop me. I think at this point I might have stopped smiling. And after I explained to them that the contract states I can go in at anytime for a visual inspection they start rambling on about the laws again. So I grab two of the morons and drag them out in the yard, brother still drinking that beer, and dare them to say one more word. They stay put and the other one is just so big and bad he is going to tear me up...LOL Well, once he figures out all his mouth running hasn't stopped me from getting closer to him he walks in the rental. Leaving the lady that we rented to all by her self. I explained that I did not care for the #$%^ saying what they did to my son. I wasn't putting up with her or them. If they were not gone by the time I ate supper that night I would return and set every damn thing she owned in the parking lot.
I ate, walked out in my front yard and yeap, they were gone. A few weeks later my cousin stopped by and was talking to me and out of the rental door comes one of the morons with a broom stick or something. He stares at us as he swings and twirls the thing like we are suppose to be scared of him. I tell cuz to hold on a sec. I go in the house get a pistol and a empty can. I return to my yard and toss the can out in front of me & cus. The moron is still staring and twirling his stick. I flip the safety throw up on the can and shoot. He put his stick down and left. Haven't seen him since. And I ended up throwing the nice lady out over rent a few months later. Now my brother lives in that rental and I told him he could deal with the other 7 a while as I was tired of doing crap like that every other day. But what really pissed me off is she did not throw that can in the trash, she threw it in the yard. 

[BasinBoy]

dont bury him in your yard theyll get suspicious. bury him next door so the neighbors get blaimed

[FinsnFur]

LOL @ Danny  :roflmao:

[THO Game Calls]

Well Danny, here in the liberal north east that would get me arrseted.   

I did have some fun with him a few years agp.  He wanted to go black powder hunting with me in the worst way.  So, opening morning, I take him out and we set up one of my two man tent blinds.  I give him a spot to watch and after 30 minutes all I hear him say is, "I hope it warms up some"  This goes on for about 3 hours.  Finally I tell him to go ahead and light a small fire in the blind.   I told him to go out and gather some sticks and stuff and bring them back but to be quiet about it.  I knew at this point that our morning hunt was over so no big deal.  Well, mr. wixxard goes and gets some twigs and comes back and procedds to build the startings of a fire.  When he is done, he says, "how do I light it?"  So I says -

"pull out one of your speed loaders and dump a little black powder in there and then throw this match on it.  I'm going out to take a pee."

Not 10 seconds later this puff of gray smoke comes rolling out the windows of the blind followed closely by Karl caughing and hacking all over the place.   I almost died laughing.  He never asked me to take him agan though.

Al
THO Game Calls
www.thogamecalls.com

[FinsnFur]

 :roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao: Now that woulda been good footage!

[iahntr]

 :roflmao:  You two are killin me!  :roflmao: I think I almost woulda payed to see those two scenes.

[Hawks Feather]

Al,

You are lucky you didn't lose the blind.  But then again, it might have been worth it if all the contents went with it.

Jerry

[cb223]

That is funny stuff! I would love to have seen that guy come running out of all the smoke.

When I was a kid my Dad had a few rental properties. I remember going with him to repair all the stuff they broke. As I got older I realized that it was a pain in the ass for him to go fix all the stuff.

Needless to say he sold them all years ago, just not worth it.

[KySongDog]

 :roflmao:   :roflmao:   :roflmao: 

Ahh! The JOY of RENTING property to MORONS........... been there, done that,  never again!  This thread brings back not so fond memories.   

[awh]

Legally she could have put me in jail. But I take my dads point of view when they start quoting law and telling me what they are "going" to do and set there shit in the parking lot. It's amazing how fast the law quoting stops when they come home to see everything sitting there and not enough room in the car to load it all.

Had one guy several years ago actually come to my moms house while me, two brothers a nephew and his friend were sitting there talking to mom. He had to have been on something as he started cussing my mother and pointing his little finger at us telling all of us that we were not going to do anything. Well, nephews friend, first time he had ever seen me or my mom, stands up and grabs the punk and out in the front yard they go. Long story short, he walked back to the rentals, called the cops, and as luck would have it the cop that shows up is a friend of the family. He toldd him he was lucky he could still walk after what he did and might want to move somewhere else. The nephews friend is now welcome around our place anytime.
Last time I saw the new friend we were at a bar, I was a little tipsy. Just a little mind ya, and I stood up on a table and told the whole bar me and this boy would whip every dang one of them. HE was in what looked to be a state of shock, but we never got any takers for some reason I left with my cop freind that night  In his cop car Didn't get to ride home though Still get yelled at about that one and they say I can't go back to that bar anymore

[TNyoteboy]

SSS....................

[FinsnFur]